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Author Topic: Rock Springs AZ  (Read 1214 times)

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January 06, 2018, 05:05:33 PM
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Rider Ron

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There is a touristy wide spot in the road a short ways north of Phoenix, just off I-17.  It's a gathering place for bikers, and is known for their food, especially their pies.  They recently overhauled the restrooms, and I took a couple pics of the 'new' men's room and sent them to my buddies back in Michigan.  Kinda cute how they "designed" them, no?

Ron

The original pics:

Beam me up, Scotty.  There's no intelligent life here.  ;-)

January 06, 2018, 05:08:52 PM
Reply #1
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Rider Ron

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One of the guys was bored and decided to add some commentary here.

What a hoot....   >:D }= £~¥

Ron

Here's his comments on this one..

It’s obvious that this restroom was specifically designed for Harley riders.

Let’s look at all of the elements that make this a successful ‘watering hole’ for the HD crowd………

A)        Let’s start with the only design flaw.  There’s not a Harley rider on the planet that would use this flush handle; let alone even understand what its’ use is.  They would likely grab it and wonder where the other handlebar was and why it’s so damn low!

B)        This is a spot for the rider to rest his belly…..or for the “females” to rest their boobs as this is obviously a unisex restroom…………………possibly transgender.

C)        The reinforcement ridge of the keg was intentionally left open on each end; this is obviously a cigarette holder.  Or joint holder.  Or both.

D)        This is the spray nozzle.  No, it sprays forward to wash the bugs, urine, puke, etc. from the assless chaps.

E)        Nice wide design.  This is so the inebriated biker can weave from side to side without spraying the restroom walls.

F)         Good design.  They left a good 5” tall lip on the front down to the drain.  This should hold most of a days’ worth of cigarettes.

G)        Leaning wall, the frame is made with ¾” black pipe attached to a graffiti proof, urine resistant divider.  It is attached to the wall with multiple stainless steel anchors for strength…..and is easily replaced.  The wall is high enough to keep rival biker gangs from talking shit to one another….about colors, bitches, penis size, etc.  Also, prevents wayward urine spray if (E) is insufficient.

H)        This is probably the most important feature.  The urine and oil absorbent mats. They are designed to soak up any weight of oil and up to one gallon of urine (for short peckered patrons). These also have a nonslip rubber backing so the vibrating biker doesn’t move about while trying to use the facilities.
Beam me up, Scotty.  There's no intelligent life here.  ;-)
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January 06, 2018, 05:09:50 PM
Reply #2
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Rider Ron

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Comments for pic #2:

This is the restroom sink.  It was installed due to state regulations although it has never been used….as a sink. 

(After all, there are only two urinals). 

But, again it was designed well and again with the Harley rider in mind. 

Let’s take a look at some of the design features….

 

A)    Obviously a soap dispenser.  Generally this would be filled with some sort of antibacterial soap or some fufu smelling lotion soap.  But in a Harley restroom….GOJO.  Nothing works better at getting 20w50 oil off your hands…..or off your ol’ lady’s face like GOJO.  Great for cleaning up your assless chaps too!

B)    Rusty steel counter top.  Nothing says functionality like this.  It is tapered heavily toward the sink so any bodily fluids will flow in the correct direction.  It is easily washed down with a garden hose or high pressure sprayer to insure all evidence will disappear as if by magic.

C)    Backsplash.  Nice dark color so as to never need cleaning.  Special material hides protein stains even when using a black light. 

I’m not so sure about the complex tile pattern with vibrating, inebriated bikers.  Might be a bit much.

D)    Nice deep dark colored sink.  Again, never needs cleaning.  No screen, no trap, just a 3” pipe that goes straight through the floor into the crawl space.    The sink should easily hold whatever cigarette butts won’t fit into the urinals.  See (F) above.

E)    This roll of paper towels has been on the counter for three and a half years.  It’s nearly half gone!  Probably some lawyer / biker wannabe homos.

F)    Excellent design!  A biker can hold on to these (A natural position for chopper riders) while he/she pukes into the sink.  (Or the crawl space as it were).  Also gives the ol’ lady something to hold onto if the need suddenly arises.  Or the homo lawyer and his boyfriend……but I digress.

G)   Lead solder.  The Romans used to add lead to their wine as it enhanced the sweetness.  But, this was a wasted effort here as surely no one is ever going to drink any water from it.

H)    Well, everyone has been to a restaurant or bar where there are things pinned to the wall indicating where the patrons are from.  Notes, dollar bills, stickers, pictures, etc.  Well this restaurant is unique.  To the untrained eye these appear to be old license plates.  But if you look closely you can see that these are actually inmate identification numbers.  Makes the bikers feel like they are part of something greater, a team, a large cohesive family of sorts…..kinda brings a tear to the eye doesn’t it?
Beam me up, Scotty.  There's no intelligent life here.  ;-)
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January 06, 2018, 06:24:10 PM
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maniacmac

Global Moderator
You have to love recycling ---everything back where it started
CARS SUCK!
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January 06, 2018, 07:06:40 PM
Reply #4
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HDBitchin

Administrator
Those friends of yours back in Michigan have a good imagination!   ^-^   ;)
HDBitchin aka Tank 
AMA Member- Click Here to Join
A Business Member of ABATE of AZ
Member of the Motorcycle Riders Foundation
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January 07, 2018, 05:14:35 PM
Reply #5
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r_k_dragon

Global Moderator
You have to love recycling ---everything back where it started

Nice!  But it does bother me somewhat when you mentioned recycling and kegs for urinals and draft beer thoughts!
USARMY 69-71, IB 1K, AZ HOG, PGR, AMA, VVA, RFTW  SR 2015 FNG, 2016 STAGING, 2017 ASST STAGING, 2018 STAGING LEADER

January 07, 2018, 09:31:09 PM
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maniacmac

Global Moderator
Nice!  But it does bother me somewhat when you mentioned recycling and kegs for urinals and draft beer thoughts!
Most of my thoughts also bother me, I have way to much windshield time to think about things. lol
CARS SUCK!

January 08, 2018, 08:13:33 PM
Reply #7
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WantMore

Supporting Member
Long read but damn funny!
Smoke em if you got em
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January 09, 2018, 11:06:08 AM
Reply #8
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NoSuperSlabs

Supporting Member
Original and damn funny!!

Those friends of yours back in Michigan have a good imagination!   ^-^   ;)
Yes they do have a good imagination but I would also say that they have a bit too much time on their hands to have come up with this but I am glad they did!  ^-^  :D
Two Lane Highway
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January 10, 2018, 09:36:50 PM
Reply #9
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bc45

Global Moderator
that is a good commentary LOL
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January 11, 2018, 06:54:52 AM
Reply #10
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j f go

Community Advocate
Original and damn funny!!
Yes they do have a good imagination but I would also say that they have a bit too much time on their hands to have come up with this but I am glad they did!  ^-^  :D
See, you guys just don't realize that in winter we have to find something to entertain us.  &{
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January 11, 2018, 11:17:47 AM
Reply #11
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HDBitchin

Administrator
See, you guys just don't realize that in winter we have to find something to entertain us.  &{
Cabin Fever!  :o
HDBitchin aka Tank 
AMA Member- Click Here to Join
A Business Member of ABATE of AZ
Member of the Motorcycle Riders Foundation
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